Friday, January 29, 2010

sleep twitch

it's cold once again in toronto.

it's this cold, as a matter of fact:



it's even this cold:



yes, so cold even your ass needs gloves. but hey, 99 cents is a steal!

in between the frantic bundling-up and the cursing of winter's return, i've been busy. yes, what else is new. but i can tell you that yes, there have been job opportunities and job offers and job interviews, and though i'm not employed just yet, i'm willing to bet i will be by this time next month. (since my whole e.i. debacle fuck-up, i had better be.) there's a few prime opportunities i'm working towards, and with a bit of luck - and a lot of impressing/charm/karma etc. - i'll hopefully land one. or at least one that'll make me happy. huzzah!



where the magic happens (and by "magic," i mean where i spend 75% of my day)

oho, what's this? vancouverites might not be so into the whole "olympics" thing after all? uh, well, safe to say that it's probably too late for that. also safe to say that if i were still living in van, i would've hightailed it out a long time ago. (preferably after subletting my kitsilano apartment for the duration of the olympics to some tourist for an assload of money)

is indie dead? asks paste magazine. ah, your existential question for the day. personally, i think this one applies more to - and can be better answered by - people from williamsburg or portland, but it's a pretty good read unto itself. and also: heavy, man.

let's talk about how much i want to see this depeche mode documentary. forget "indie" -- the band-fandom subculture is always the one that fascinates me the most, having my own roots so deeply entrenched in it as they are. i was one, i am one, i know how they think, i know where they stand, and i can so fully empathize with fans of bands. it's an interesting way to be.

on the darker side of band documentaries, pete doherty may be responsible for the death of a libertines documentary filmmaker. the reason? drugs, of course. oh, pete. at least we can be sure he'll be wearing a natty hat to the trial.

your wild but sort of hot rumour of the day: angelina jolie may have had an affair with lady gaga. let your imaginations - and slashfics - run wild, everyone!

movie actors of a different sort: hawksley workman and dave bidini to act in a hockey musical film. bidini i can see, obviously, but hawksley? well, i guess he is a good ol' northern ontario boy... (p.s. plug for my most recent interview with mr. workman)

i know the news broke a few days ago, but hey look, juno awards in toronto in 2011! how many junos do you think nickelback will have by then? or anne murray, or celine dion? congrats on your outstanding record sales and for giving canadian music a shitty name worldwide! bah.

and now for a tale of two baked goods:



i can't take credit for this glorious monstrosity - that would be penny's right - but this, if you can use your imagination enough, is a penis cake for our friend amanda's "dirty 30" birthday party last weekend. see, the two lumps on the side are supposed to be the balls - with the brown sprinkles as pubes, obviously - and the weird cleft-ed top layer (there's five layers of cake there) is the head...yeah, maybe you had to be there. (this is to say nothing for the fact that penny made me a vagina cake for my birthday a few years ago...girl works as an accountant but ought to consider a career in naughty baking)

taming it down now:



chocolate chip cookies for allegra -- because every girl needs cookies post-breakup. this recipe is crisco's ultimate chocolate chip cookie (follow that link, but omit chopped pecans and add 1/4 teaspoon ground cinnamon), which is meaningful to me for three reasons:

1. this was my mom's go-to recipe for chocolate chip cookies, thus they are also my go-to recipe for chocolate chip cookies, and they are synonymous with childhood comfort to me.

2. they're the very first thing i ever learned how to bake on my own. and they've been foolproof every single bloody time.

3. i brought the best batch i ever made of those cookies to my "good friend" dean on boxing day 2007, as a thank-you for letting me crash on his "couch" (haha) while i was visiting toronto from vancouver. (though i didn't know at the time that he couldn't eat chocolate, but oh well, the thought was enough) moral of the story: these cookies get you laid. make them today!

alright, that's enough for now. go enjoy yer friday.

[ music | editors, "papillon" ]

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

i felt the earth inhale

urgh, so life goes.

minor peeve: why the fuck don't cashiers and convenience-store clerks change bills properly anymore? when i was a cashier and a customer asked me to break a bill for change, i always gave them what they asked for. but these days, whenever laundry time rolls around and i need loonies and quarters (it's a loonie and two quarters for the washing machine, then another two loonies and four quarters for two spins in the dryer), i'll politely ask for my change in loonies and quarters - even after i've bought something, so i'm a paying customer! - and the cashier will either give me a blank stare, a curt "i don't have enough change for that", or else ignore my request altogether and shove a couple of toonies and a quarter or two at me.

seriously, fuck you people. customer service, my ass. maybe i ought to stop being nice and shove the toonies back at them, and snap something about how i specifically asked for loonies and quarters. but again, too nice. too many years in the retail industry.

major peeve: myself, really, and my tendency to rush ahead and do shit at warp speed once i'm behind the keyboard. it's because of this tendency that i now have to wait another month for my employment insurance payout -- let me explain: i filed a claim to receive e.i. after the company went bankrupt mid-december, but i didn't have my record of employment at the time, so i wasn't able to receive anything. when i finally did get my r.o.e. in the mail, i failed to notice that it said it had also been submitted electronically (at the end of december), and so i went ahead and filed another claim.

in hindsight, that's a big fail right there.

because even though i'd filed two e.i. reports on my first claim since then, my accident filing of a second claim caused service canada to negate my first claim, and delete both reports with it. translation: no government money for caitlin. at least, not until the system clears the faulty second claim and lets me re-file. that should be next week sometime, and by then, it'll be another month until i get any payouts.

i talked to a nice woman at service canada today, and this all seems to check out, which is a little more maddening because it serves to prove that i totally fucked it up all on my own -- all because i didn't navigate the service canada website correctly, and thought i had to file a new claim once i had my r.o.e. in hand. so yeah, nobody to blame but myself for the fact that now i won't have any support throughout the month of february, aside from whatever i have left in my dwindling savings account. which makes the whole finding-a-job-asap thing even more imperative. sigh.

anyway, aside from the rage and self-hatred, spent today doing it up domestic-style: went to the gym, finished reading cujo (read it in a little over 24 hours), did laundry, finished interview transcription, wrote pretty much all of this blog entry, roasted a chicken and a platter of root veggies (plus brussels sprouts because the boy loves 'em), and now i'm chilling before watching hockey. a whole day without even changing out of my pajamas. say what you will about unemployment - it is boring and it does suck to have no money, for sure - but damn if it isn't the most productive you'll be in your adult life.

forgot to mention last time that i'm actually sort of stoked for super bowl xliv coming up in a couple of weeks -- yes, me who held a great dislike for football right up until the last six months or so. i still don't understand how it's played, or the logistics of it, or why the fuck the plays only last like two seconds (my short attention spans means i prefer faster-moving sports), but i've liked the saints all season and will definitely be cheering for them on february 7th. championship games always mean more when you actually care about one of the teams competing.

that said, anybody having a super bowl party? can i crash it? i'll bring goodies, a boyfriend with great stories, and a general sense of merrymaking.

now, what was i talking about last time...? oh right, this:

















in this light and on this evening
, the new/third album from the uk's editors, a band i've loved and followed since their first album came out back in 2005. the similar sound to another of my favourite bands, the almighty interpol, certainly didn't hurt at the time, but now i love them for far more than just that. (and, having seen them live twice now, i can safely and confidently say that editors are actually a better live band than interpol, by leaps and bounds at that. shocking!)

their third album came out last october in the uk, but for some reason it didn't get a release in north america until now, and so it flew under my radar until i got a digital copy for interview prep purposes. and holy shit, i'm so glad i did. literally, i listened to the damn thing four times the first day i had it. one thing i've always loved about their music is the way that they have songs that initially sound dark and forboding, but there's always a hopeful, light-at-the-end-of-the-tunnel message hidden somewhere in there. you may have to listen really hard for it, but it's there. it's that juxtaposition of hopelessness and faith that i love in editors' music, and it's definitely all over their new stuff.

also, my benefactors at chartattack, bless them, picked up early on my love for the band, and so i've done almost all of their editors coverage over the years. to whit:

feature interview with frontman tom smith - june 2007

review of an end has a start - june 2007

live review - march 2006

news interview with bassist russell leetch - march 2006

i know, right? and there'll be a news interview with drummer ed lay going up within the next few weeks. (that's the interview transcript i was working on earlier. after i told ed that i've now interviewed their bassist, singer and drummer, he told me i deserve a "special award" for that. lolz)

more multimedia: here's the video for the first single off of in this light and on this evening, "papillon". i was wary at first, not sure if my love for this band would hold up the same after the first new single in two years, but surprise surprise, i love the damn song. (in fact, it's my favourite on the album, alongside the insanely awesome title track) the video's a little odd - and the lead guy vaguely resembles my idiot ex - but just try to resist getting into the song itself:



f'in brilliant. new music happiness.

okay, that's enough for now. i need to get out and take more pictures. more pretty things to look at soon, i promise.

p.s. psssst, reader who googles "roaminginthenight" to get to my blog every single day -- uh, wouldn't it be easier to bookmark my blog? just sayin'.

[ music | editors, "papillon" ]

Monday, January 25, 2010

who i think i am

now that that's over with...

thanks especially to the peeps who gave me good solid feedback on the last entry, along with their own stories and advice. you ladies are totally the awesome (kat, thanks for the femilia link - i signed up asap! - and anonymous, thanks for the interesting reading!), and definitely confirmed for me that pill-less is the way to go. crazy to say, but i actually do feel a little empowered when i think about it. yar.

i should ask you guys for advice and feedback more often. smart readership, i have.

a'ight, sorry menfolk. here's some stuff to keep all genders entertained:

the fact that prince wrote a minnesota vikings song was almost as surprising to me as learning that prince is anti-homosexual. dude is such a ball of conflicting signals! i'm so confused right now. (but it's probably good that i don't even like prince.)

clip from the runaways movie! yes, i'm still stoked to see this (i like both dakota fanning and kristen stewart, thanks). apparently director floria sigismondi has a flat around the corner from our apartment, but i sort of doubt she's home much.

just in time for the aftermath of my reading the libertines: bound together, there's news that a libertines reunion may be on the rise! i know, i know, this story has been floating around in various incarnations since, well, the band split, but it's looking pretty positive these days. now, the question will be whether or not their old glory can be recaptured...my money's on no, but it should make for a good college try anyway.

mgmt have strange, unlikely influences. they've just been added to the bamboozle lineup, by the way, if you're in new jersey and into that sort of thing. (speaking of jersey's less than tasteful ambassadors, mat from kill hannah analyzes jersey shore. and it's a must-read, as usual.)

i don't know if it's my uterus or what, but the lilith fair lineup actually looks sort of appealing. well, the girl-rock parts of it anyway, not so much on the guitar-strumming earth folkie parts. i'd leave those to my mom. (she loves joan baez and the like)

interviewing editors over the phone in less than an hour. pretty stoked. love 'em. will rant more on the editors love next time.

[ music | the libertines, "can't stand me now" ]

Sunday, January 24, 2010

take your meds

here is a topic that will be tmi for some (dudes mostly), and not understandable for others (dudes again), but i have no way of knowing what gender my readership is, and this is my blog anyway, so here we go: i'm going off birth control pills.



blargh. away with thee!

(but not because i'm trying to get pregnant let's get that out of the way right now. no preggo. not the point.)

so yeah, tmi alert because i'm going to be talking about menstruation here. but come on, we're all adults here, right? right??

.....okay, anyway. don't care. continuing.

(i guess i'm so okay with talking about this because for one, i have no filter, and for two, i live with a male who's not so squick about female business; after all, he watched his former girlfriend give birth to their son, and if you aren't aware of some of the graphic horrors of childbirth, allow cracked.com to fill you in.)

background: i've been on the pill (first on cyclen, then switched to tri-cyclen lo after the amount of hormones in cyclen starting fucking with me) since i was twenty. so for about seven years now, artificial hormones have been tricking my body into thinking it's constantly pregnant, making it impossible to get pregnant for real, which is pretty much exactly what i want. no baby, thanks. no womb for rent.

yet i suspect the synthetic hormones i've been pumping into my system daily haven't been all that good for me. yes, there's been plenty of good benefits; my skin's super-clear, my periods are timed down to the hour and day (third tuesday of the month, between 5 and 6 a.m.), and y'know, the whole no-baby thing. but lately, i've started to think maybe it's been responsible for a number of personal health issues i've been having in various levels of severity over the last year or so. compound that with the fact that both last november and this month, my period's come four days early - which it is definitely not supposed to do when you're on the pill - and i've started to suspect that the tricyclen lo is losing its effectiveness on my system. which means i could get a prescription for a different type of pill from my doctor when i go for my pap test next week (gotta make sure nothing bigger is wrong here)...or i could quit messing with my natural biology altogether. well, then.

additionally, my gyno has had reason to believe i might have endometriosis - check out the delightful description of endometriosis here - but there was no way he could tell as long as i was on the pill. i'd have to go off it for at least six months for him to be able to monitor my "normal" periods are like. if they look like a scene from saw iv - and i'm in as much screaming pain as a saw iv extra - then yes, there's a pretty damn good chance i have endometriosis, which would require a routine operation to clean me out. which will protect my future fertility.

...hah, "clean me out." told you this was all tmi-ville up in here.

so basically, i'm quitting the pill not because i'm attempting to get knocked up - oh my god no no no thank you - but because i'm just not into the idea of ingesting fake hormone pills anymore. i really want to stop putting that stuff in my system and letting natural hormones come back and take their course. i want to know how much of my moodiness and mopeyness is due to the pills i've been taking for so long, and if not taking them anymore will lift that veil of crappiness.

(also, if you want to put a quasi-feminist spin on it, i really do enjoy the idea of reclaiming my body from big pharma. fuck you guys!)

see, i've never been a huge fan of medication. i'm not on any other meds; i don't even like taking tylenol. i recoil whenever i have to get a shot (no, i did not get my h1n1 vaccine). i just flinch heavily at the idea of pumping anything into my system that my body didn't create by itself. i take vitamins, sure, but i consider those supplementary to my diet and nowhere near the same thing as getting a vaccine. i don't buy into big pharma very much, i suppose. darwinism is where it's at.

anyway! yep, that's about it. boyfriend knows and boyfriend is okay with it, we've agreed to be careful and take precautions and everything else i'm not going into here because it's private bizness between he and i. but he's cool with it, even supportive, and i'm pretty jazzed about that. this is one of the best benefits of having an older boyfriend: maturity!

now, to my female readership (the guys have long since closed their browser windows or scrolled right past here): any warning flags you see here? any reason why i shouldn't go off the pill after seven years on it? and are you on any form of birth control? why or why not? inquiring minds (me) want to know. i mean, seriously, up until now i figured being on the pill was the norm. it's only been recently that i've realized that that's not the case for a lot of women, and i'd like to know why -- and how many are like me, not attempting to get pregnant but rather trying to keep their body in its natural state.

so yeah, leave me a comment here, reply to me on twitter, shoot me an e-mail, whatevs. it's all good.

here's a picture of our mantle, just for kicks:



[ music | editors, "papillon" ]

Thursday, January 21, 2010

work it baby

aside from madly applying for jobs - both through the convenient online avenues and also the old-fashioned pounding-the-pavement way, resumes in hand - here's what's been keeping me busy (and, er, o.d.'ing on carbs): waking up the latent bread-baker genes within me.



multigrain english muffins. turned out a little small, and more like a cross between a bun and a scone than a true english muffin, but they were still tasty. and i still have a buttload of 'em in my freezer, argh.



honey whole-wheat bread. didn't knead it for nearly long enough, so it turned out rather small and overly damp, sort of like a crusty, yeasty banana bread. (which, coincidentally, is coming up next -- using my tried-and-true and completely unhealthy banana bread recipe to make a loaf for my overworked boyfriend) but again, still tasty. just need lots of practice, which will be welcomed.

i sent all those pics to my mom - e-mailing my mom is still a novelty, and happens maybe once a blue moon - and she replied back to ask when i'm opening my own bakery. ha. ha ha.

bonus for you!: a pretty terrible picture of me all haughty and emo.



toned to black-and-white to spare you all the cadaverous tones of my skin. i must have yet to find the proper colour of foundation -- i'm still stuck on wearing "ivory" everything. (though what i'm wearing on my body is a fantastic kill hannah hoodie, which i do not regret spending $50 on last year, because i wear the damn thing all the time and it's ridiculously comfy)

god, this entry is already scattered and all over the place. i'm not sure if i've had too much coffee, or not enough.

let's try to rein things in here:

...actually, if you'd like, keep the insanity rolling with this lady gaga-meshuggah mashup. even the video syncs up! and shhhh, i think i might even like it better this way. i do enjoy the metalz, it's true. (though by saying that, i must direct you all here, and instruct you to watch the first video on the profile, which was filmed in 1994 and features my drumming boyfriend, sixteen years ago, looking the exact same that he does today. it's...a little scary. but sort of awesome. i'm dating dorian gray!)

speaking of the lady - she's everywhere these days, in case you didn't notice - idolator brings us these lady gaga cookies. because some fans really are just that creative, and that crazy. actually, i kind of approve.

something to make the canadian music sites go nuts: fucked up diss sonic youth, in song form. ooooh! ahhhh! band feuds that we actually might care about because they feature one of our own! i still liked wayne coyne vs. arcade fire, personally. or even k-os vs. k'naan. them's good feudin'.

prince william likes linkin park! unfortunately, he's also a kanye west fan, which gives 'ye something else to be super-bigheaded about. i always liked prince harry better anyway.

in case you were one of the four people who missed it, the coachella 2010 lineup is out now. i'd probably just go for day 2, personally. dead weather, muse, the raveonettes, gossip....fuck yes to all.

and if coachella is right around the corner, that means it's also almost time for south by southwest 2010! looks like it'll be hosting the premiere american screening of the white stripes documentary in which jack & meg white toured through every province and territory here in the good ol' great white north. i'm not the biggest white stripes fan or anything (i appreciate their singles though), but this is definitely a cool concept -- no pun intended.

interviewing the guitarist from editors on monday, which is kind of funny, because that means i'll have interviewed three of that band's four members. but they've always been a nice bunch of lads and good fun to talk to, so i'm looking forward to it. maybe someday i'll even get to talk to that elusive fourth member! hah.

that's all. waiting on employment insurance to kick in. 'tis all.

p.s. do any of my benevolent readers out there want to buy me a subscription to bust magazine? i'll bake you some really awesome cookies.

[ music | echo & the bunnymen, "never stop" ]

Monday, January 18, 2010

you're wrong you're right



enjoying this pic mostly because of how ambisexual i look. and yes, the hoodie has cat ears.

indie 103.1 is, incredibly, playing poison's "we're an american band" right now, and i can't believe how cheesy it is. "we're coming to your town, we're gonna party down, we're an american band"? oh, man. the 80's were a priceless time, indeed.

anyway, sitting at home on a monday afternoon, a few hours away from gym + spin class (exercise is my best medicine for mopeyness and inertia -- i didn't get to the gym yesterday and the boy could attest to how moody and grouchy i was), drinking a huge mug of earl grey blue star tea (props to the tea store in north van -- this shit is amazing), waiting for e-mails and phone calls that aren't coming, and trying to sort my shit out. as are most people, i'm sure, but i have this outlet here, and damn if i'm not gonna use it, throwing all caution to wind in regards to who might end up reading this (i'm now including this blog on my professional media/writing resume).

disclaimer: i'm not looking for comfort or pity here; i know something will come up for me, job-wise. i know things will work out. if there's anything i've learned in my twenties, it's that everything works out the way it's supposed to, even if it doesn't seem that way at the time. so i'm not overly concerned about that, really; i'll be okay in the end. i always am. but i'd be remiss if i didn't take this downtime to think about things, and write about them, and try to sort shit out for myself. so.

i didn't really start thinking about my possible future - what i'd be when i grew up, so to speak - until i was about seventeen, a year away from applying to universities, when you really do have to consider what you intend on doing with your life. but here was my problem: other than being able to write, i had no bankable talents or skills. other than following bands around the country, i had very few serious passions. and so i had no fucking clue what to do with my life.

by combining my one bankable skill with my one big passion, i at least had one possible goal: to be a professional music journalist. however, fast forward ten years, and that goal is still possible yet unfeasible. journalists don't make money anymore. print media is dying, for the most part. it's insanely hard to make any sort of living by being a writer. i have a shitload of friends who are writers - and i still am one as well, freelancing when i can - and they'd all say the same. so, barring being struck by creative lightning and writing the next great canadian novel, that idea's out.

but i didn't know that when i was seventeen, when my only laser-beam focus was on getting to the city where all the rock stars were: toronto. and so i picked the biggest university i could attend in that city - that would be the university of toronto, aka "harvard north," where your wallet is drained of money and your face is drained of happiness - and figured i'd sort my career path out from there.

i'll be twenty-seven this year. and i'm still trying to figure out what i want to be when i grow up.

so yes, i am a little scared. yes, i do feel sort of like a freak of nature. i'm almost thirty, for christ's sake -- shouldn't i know by now? shouldn't i have this sorted out? and if not now, then when? how much longer do i have to figure it out before i have to settle for less than what i want?

but then, of course, leads back to the question of what i want, and i can't even answer that, because i don't have an answer for it, which is the point i've been trying to get at here. see, it all goes in a circle of madness.

yet there's no way a girl can go ten years without developing, growing and evolving in at least a few ways, so i know i'm not the same limited person i was as a teenager in kingston. i've got a better idea of my capabilities and my possibilities, though with that yin-knowledge also comes the yang-knowledge of my limitations and inabilities. but you can't know one without the other, i suppose.

skills? i'm dedicated. i'm punctual to a fault. i work well with a team. i can type really fast. i can multitask like the dickens. i know my social media in and out, plus a strong amount of seo/sem. i can program html coding and read it like a second language. i'm immersed in pop culture. i'm super-organized.

passions? cooking, baking, recipe hunting. reading and writing, as always. music, musicians, live music and recorded music. physical activity. hockey. my city. cats. coffee and tea. travel.

somewhere in that jumble, i want to find the connection, the grey area where they all (or at least some vital ones) come together, and then i'll find what i want to do with my life. at least, that's what i tell myself, anyway.

...i mean, for hell's sake, i know it could be so much wrong. (and i hate even throwing any sort of pity party for myself when all this horror is going down in haiti. please go donate whatever you can spare to médecins sans frontières/doctors without borders -- they do good work) i have so much to be thankful for; i have my good health, a boyfriend who loves me like crazy no matter how much of a headcase i can be, a family that cares about me and supports me through everything, friends who listen to me and give me solid advice. i have a roof over my head and food in my cupboard. i have this blog. i have you guys reading, even though i don't know all of you and you don't have to care about my stupid life anyway. i have my past and all the things i've done in my twenty-seven years on this planet, and nobody can take them away from me.

but what i do want - what i think we all want, fundamentally - is a career where i'll be happy and fulfilled and not constantly looking for the escape hatch. i don't even need to be rich (though being able to pay my bills and my student debt is a must, unfortunately). i just want to be happy.

it's a lot to ask, i know. but here's hoping that now, at a crossroads once again, life finally steers me in that direction.

[ music | death cab for cutie, "meet me on the equinox" ]

Friday, January 15, 2010

slow reaction

hello. quiet pensive headache-y friday night rumblings ahead.



i love my little teapot. my time in vancouver - coincidentally, where this teapot came from; my dad bought it for me, it's a west-coast import from japan - turned me into an absolute tea nerd. i've always drank green tea especially (particularly matcha, if i can spare the wallet-busting amounts of cash for it) and i like me some chai or peppermint tea every now and then, but again, vancouver turned me onto earl grey, particularly with a bit of milk and vanilla. particularly if it's murchie's ms. grey, which is what i'm drinking here. ahhhh.

(note to self: work on properly using the focus on yer damn camera. the foreground items should be in sharp focus, not the background. derg.)

things that make me happy right now, other than a good cuppa (things that i've previously twittered about, that is):

1. rob zombie's directing a csi: miami episode. those who know me well know of my terrible, terrible weakness for the cheeseball crime show that is csi: miami (i will also take csi: new york in a pinch, but not the las vegas one thnx), and getting to see it have the zombie treatment will be something. at least, i hope. they tend to hype up the guest spots a bit too much on that show. (ashlee simpson & pete wentz's ten minutes of screen time, anyone?)

2. the tekken movie trailer. seriously, i can't believe this is actually happening, or that it looks like something i would totally watch -- uh, multiple times. (admittedly, mortal kombat was my favourite movie when i was 12.) granted, it does look somewhat terrible, but also super-close to the game's characters and storylines.

i will now make a statement that could out my past far more than i'd prefer: that is what i would want a toshinden live-action movie to look like. that is all i will say on this matter.

(also from my twitter, which miss wrath is thisclose to joining, c'monnnn you know you want to: i'm going to be sorting food bank donations next friday from 9:30 to 4 p.m.. you ought to think about coming too, all/any of you in the toronto area. i always figure, if my life's going crappily, i just need to get perspective, and the best way to do that is to help out those less fortunate than me)

suede: the one-off reunion, coming soon. but it's really suede 2.0, since bernard butler isn't in, which sort of sucks. but that's the grudge-bearing brit musicians for you. i just can't wait for a disgruntled gallagher brother to pop up in some way, shape or form in the next year or two. oh, what shenanigans!

axl rose, current day. hold the incident, just pass the spaghetti.

amanda palmer and neil gaiman are engaged to be married! super awesome baroque-goth hipster indie rock fairy-tale marriage coming. too perfect. many congrats to the lovely couple!

eye weekly's cross-canada music critics poll!...that i, once again, did not choose to take part in. i dunno, i used to be all about those year-end critics' list, but now i just feel like they're tired and overdone. and i never seem to like anywhere close to ten albums per year, anyway.

also, i have decided that i have until the end of the month to find a job - or until, gods willing, a job finds me - or else i'll have to do something drastic. by that, i mean i'll have to swallow my pride, admit self-defeat and return to an old job. yeah, you know the one. we've all got our old standards. but hey, bills and rent need paying, plus all work and no play etc etc....i just hope it doesn't have to come down to that. you'll all know in a month, i guess.

here's to things working out the way they're supposed to. here's to having faith that they will.

now it's time for shaft on tv, and friday-night chillin', and dreading having to get up at 7 a.m. tomorrow so i can go to spin class. at least the saturday morning instructor plays some decent indie rock.

[ music | kill hannah, "stunt pilots" ]

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

love me as a loser

when times are tough, i rely more and more on books. sounds antiquated, but it's true.



(the skulls belong to dean. i swear.)

i'm willing to bet a lot of my readership can agree with this -- after all, if you're taking time out of your day (or procrastinating from your job, whatever) to visit my blog, then obviously you're literate enough to enjoy the act of reading words, and so i'd take a gamble and say many of you also have similarly-stacked bookshelves. i dunno, i'm just proud of mine and its wide, awesome selection. would be wider and more awesome if i hadn't done two book purges in my adult life - once leaving toronto for vancouver, once leaving vancouver for toronto (neither time could i afford the excess baggage) - but them's the breaks.

anyway, it was the same in vancouver as it is now: when i'm going through a period of boredom (vancouver; i didn't own a television) or anxiety (now; i'm still unemployed), i survive on reading. when i was a kid growing up in the boons, i got to make the big trip to the huge city of kingston once or twice a month, and every time my father took me to the library -- where i'd check out at least four books and proceed to devour them all within a week. it's sort of still like that now -- i went to the revamped toronto public library at bloor & gladstone on sunday and checked out a massive stack of books, all of which to be read within the next couple of weeks. save me, literature!

oh yeah, and job interview today was the awesome, thx. good things may come of this. at least, i sure have my fingers crossed that they do. this could be the next big stepping stone of my life right here -- i'll let you know when i know, etc.



peanut butter oatmeal cookies, for triumph!!1!1

this morning's most interesting read: insane movie fan theories that might just make sense! granted, i haven't seen all the movies referenced there, but a few of 'em might just blow you away. (however, not so unexpected: avatar plot fail. just saw it yesterday - in full 3-d imax glory - and while it was stunning, the plot was so derivative of at least half a dozen other movies)

i have to give credit to octo for retweeting this first, but idolator brings it together with a post on the "badder romance" remake video. seriously. f'in. ingenius.

owen pallett was almost "skylord". also ingenius.

m.i.a. opens a can of whoop-ass on the new york times. deservedly so, too, if you go check out the article. sri lanka? no thanks, not into painting a pretty gloss over years of genocide.

the cure and franz ferdinand added to the alice in wonderland soundtrack. but, uh, look at the rest of the album listing. i can applaud the awesomeness of fat bob - really, he makes everything better - but not so much on the avril caterwauling or the atrocity of 3oh!3. god help us all.

toronto island concert - née olympic island festival - will be headlined by pavement and broken social scene. this is what it sounds like when hipsters cry (tears of joy).

alright, back to digesting (made thai chicken pizza tonight using the pioneer woman's crust recipe - yes, i finally got her cookbook, and miss wrath, i believe this means we must have a cooking date sometime soon) and finishing this ghastly leafs game. as expected. sigh.

p.s. nothing cheers a girl like getting an unexpected little package from her father in the mail (in this case, it was souvenirs from his and my stepmom's post-christmas trip to vancouver -- a half-pound of loose-leaf light earl grey tea from old favourite murchie's, and a haida keychain). daddy's girls, unite!

[ music | joe bowen losing his breath as he does mad commentary ]

Friday, January 8, 2010

time of the flood

somewhere between 4-5 hours after i posted that last blog entry (i left at 3:30 for a job interview) and the time my boyfriend got home that day, our apartment filled up with at least an inch of water. seems that the asshole tenants of apartment #5 got their revenge, if unknowingly.

here's what the boy - having worked on and off in construction - theorized: with all the cold weather we've been having lately, and with nobody in apartment #5 to run any of their water, one of their vital pipes froze and burst on thursday afternoon. by early evening, water had been running out of one of the pipes in the laundry room and right under the wall into our apartment (this happened a couple time back in the summer, too -- heavy rain causing backed-up storm drains causing flooding). cue the boy arriving home in the early evening, then calling me as soon as i got out of my interview to request that i bring home some more beer -- because it was going to be a long night.



the aftermath 1 - the next morning, after mopping + dehumidifyer running on high all night

i mopped our soaked floor for two and a half hours straight, repeating to myself a constant mantra of "it could have been worse. it could have been sewage." (and hey, at least we have clean floors now)

and, because i am otherwise useless in home-fixing scenarios, i baked a pie, or at least something that ended up resembling a pie in the end:



is it pie? i'm not even really sure.

anyway, the boy fortunately still has many friends from his time working in construction, and it just so happened that one of his good buddies is well-versed in plumbing. so over came good buddy steve - a real awesome trooper, especially given that he had to go to home depot around 9:30 p.m. and then be at our place fixing a pipe until close to 11 - and he and dean worked on 1) cutting the troublesome pipe and 2) attaching a shutoff valve so that the rest of the house could have hot & cold water. fortunately, all went well, and the house (which currently consists of boy & i, plus two separate other female tenants and our landlord/landlady) was thankfully able to flush toilets and take showers this morning. hurrah!

oh yeah, and our landlord was both awol and unreachable throughout all of this fiasco. here's hoping he's back by the time the bill comes in.

so, in the end, it definitely could have been worse: it wasn't sewage (thank god thank god), there was only an inch of water rather than up to our ankles, and nothing was ruined save for a crappy floor-cover rug that was here when we moved in (and has since been pitched into our back alley to freeze to a snow-covered lump). well, my playstation might not be so good, but i haven't fired it up yet so i won't know until then. but it's a tough old piece of shit, so i wouldn't doubt it's completely fine.



the aftermath 2 - dry once again, but the debris remains



[fixed] pipe dreams

link dumps for the day:

if i were a movie director and someone completely and utterly ripped off my concept, i'd be pissed off -- but repo! the genetic opera director darren bousman is taking the higher road. good on him for not sending mass legions of goth-rock fans to attack this copycat bullshit. (yes, i will gladly admit to greatly enjoying repo!, but then again, i am totally its target audience)

the new internet sensation: sleep talkin' man. you read about it here first. (and okay, maybe twitter. and maybe facebook. oh, social media channels, i work with you and i love you but you can be such a spoiler sometimes)

feminist music fans rejoice as exclaim! reports that the top five billboard charts spots are all held by women -- for the first time ever! it's funny, i used to never really be into female musicians at all, but as time has gone on - and as my tastes have matured, maybe - i'm more into a lot of female artists. i'm still picky about them, but there's a few i really love, which maybe means i'm starting to see them as more than competition. or something like that. hard to explain.

the five most metal movie characters. i always thought conan the barbarian looked like he belonged in heavy metal.

more greatness added to south by southwest 2010 (scroll down to midpage to see the list so far, and prepare to ask yourself over and over again how some people come up with such outrageously ridiculous band names). every year i say i'm going to go, but i still have yet to make the great musical pilgrimage to austin, texas. this year? maybe? hopefully? argh.

just finished audrey niffenegger's her fearful symmetry the other day, and well...eeep. at first i thought my stomach-churning bemusement and disappointment was due to how much i loved her last effort, the time traveler's wife, but then i read the load of reviews on amazon.com that basically echoed how i felt, and realized i'm not alone. sighhhh.

okay, this will probably be my last update until next week; the boy's son is staying with us this weekend, so there will be more real-life good times with the kiddo rather than plugged-in online life, which is nice for a change. hope you all have equally fun plans this chilly january weekend!

p.s. got a big exciting job-opportunity interview next tuesday. psyching self up already. reminder to self: make notes beforehand. do research. memorize. study. be awesome and get this job. excelsior!

[ music | a place to bury strangers, "in your heart" ]

Thursday, January 7, 2010

not gonna hurt

would you believe that it's possible for one to be unemployed yet still super-busy? it's true, my friends.

the sleeping-in super late and being lazy in the morning? i like that. i like that a lot right now. sure, i'm going to get bored and anxious of it if i don't have a job by february, but i'm making the most of it right now. and the most of it includes sitting here and writing blog entries for you fine people. hello!

meanwhile, the search continues for either a full- or part-time job to keep me busy and keep some money coming in. if you know me in person, you know i can be a ball of nervous energy if left alone without any tasks for long. yes, i do like my alone time, and i've even been known to chill out on occasion, but i pretty much always need something on my daily schedule or else i go bonkers. so far, that one daily task has been hitting the gym at some point in the day, and/or at least getting out of the damn house for a while. and so far: success.

...though as i was just typing that, i got a call for a job interview on sunday. and oh yeah, i have one this afternoon as well. no deets on anything because i don't know what employers are googling me and finding this blog, but i swear: no employment for certain until i say so. unless i give the word, i am still funemployed. please hire me, etc.

couple of shots from last night at the dakota, to keep you interested:



camera fuckery



beerlight



experimenting with aperture



ian blurton + huron



blur factor (no pun intended)



i'm a sucker for bathroom wall poetry

and now for the epic news of the millennium: sir christopher lee is releasing a concept album of symphonic metal! yes, that christopher lee. from star wars and lord of the rings. yes, him. holy shit, amazingness! (did i mention he's 87 years old? awesome)

five obscure pop culture conspiracy theories. good readins for those of us who've been spending too much time reading vigilant citizen. the conspiracies, they're everywhere! (i particularly like the one about pitchfork being fascists.)

speaking of our favourite decimal-point loving dictators, they're reporting that lil wayne will be voicing a cartoon jesus. what, kanye west wasn't available?

i wrote this about one mr. hawksley workman. i really ought to get back more into interviewing bands and writing features. not that i feel like i'm losing my touch with it or anything, but i do like to see the finished product (hence me posting it here, on twitter, and so on).

in the "duh" file: muse asked to score the new clash of the titans movie. well, of course. who the fuck else?

and because it's everywhere right now, check out drunk mariah carey, always good for the lolz. she'd be right at home at the brit awards (my favourite award show of the year, mostly due to the amount of inebrieted rock stars falling down on their way to the podium)!

okay, that's it for now. time for me to finish my book - i'm right at the suspenseful part, shhhhh do not disturb - and drink 2 to 4 more cups of coffee.

p.s. if you aren't reading the kitchn by now, go go go.

[ music | css, "let's make love and listen to death from above" ]

Sunday, January 3, 2010

come into my barrio

just call me mrs. lovett:







so yeah, maybe i was a little too excited about finally/successfully pulling off the making of a pie. (this one, to be exact -- used the recipe for our new year's day dinner) what can i say, anything involving pastry or bread dough still scares the shit out of me. so. many. easily fucked up variables. but i used the leftover frozen dough that i made after christmas under the watchful eye of my master-baker mother, and though it didn't turn out as picture-worthy as her pies, she's made somewhere in the realm of a thousand of them and this was my first. and it tasted like awesome. leftovers for two nights afterward, fuuuuck yeah.

okay, the biggest news first, although everyone and their wacky uncle have probably heard already: soundgarden reuniting. you can find various bits and pieces of info on this all across the internets, but exclaim! there has a good wrapup. even if the boyfriend thinks it's a grand mal hoax on the part of chris cornell. (somehow, i keep forgetting that i interviewed chris cornell years ago. yes, it's getting to that point where i literally can't remember who i've interviewed unless i look at my folder of audio files, and even then i feel like it's lying to me.)

meanwhile, idolator takes a few guesses on musicians we won't remember ten years from now. i would suggest audioslave, but that's too simple right now.

behold: stereogum's most downloaded mp3s of 2009! i like this a lot because it seems like all of those 50 mp3s are still available to download, and there's a good many quality tunes on there that you should add to your ipod right away (particularly the raveonettes, the decemberists, chairlift and o+s). yep, that pretty much is my 2009, right there -- thanks, indie 103.1. i promise to still listen to you as much as possible even though i don't have an all-day desk job anymore.

the globe and mail gives us 2009's best and worst in fashion. mostly props because lady gaga's on the list (of course).

just in time for the next twenty years, cracked reminds us of the six things people in the 1900s thought we'd have by now. nope, no rocket gliders yet, people. sorry. check back in 2020. (also, i got distracted by 12 'sexy' ads that will give you nightmares and have been alternately laughing and cringing for the last ten minutes)

in a somewhat-related segue from that last part in parenthesises, no child molestors at the super bowl! well, it's considerably more complicated than that. and it brings back that weirdness that was the whole pete townshend-"child abuse research" scandal. remember that? not so good times.

miss the top hits of '09 already? here they are, condensed in a five-minute mega mash-up. dancefloor madness y'all.

okay, back to my sunday of being lazy and watching hockey with boy before finishing the star trek movie (i fell asleep partway into it last night -- this is what happens when you watch movies late and in bed). sleeping in tomorrow. ahhhh, funemployment.

[ music | interpol, "the specialist" ]

Friday, January 1, 2010

blue moon

2010! huzzah!!

(though really, i'm more disturbed by the fact that in another ten years, i'll be thirty-seven. holy mother of god.)

with sofi's great article in mind, new year's eve was a stay-in around these parts. sure, boy and i had ideas and half-hearted plans, but then things came up and things came down and we ended up just deciding to stay in with booze, junk food, and district 9. (yes, i watched it again. so good you don't even know) and a great new year's it was.



boy thinks this picture makes him "look old". i'm more distracted by how giant and anime-like his eyes are. kawaii!


even better news? new year's eve afternoon's sweet, sweet sounds of the asshole neighbours upstairs moving out. sure enough, the unit's deserted, and they are gone, motherfuckers. and we are much pleased. and i'm going to bake a batch of cookies for our landlord tomorrow.

anyway. so you say you want a...resolution??? (groan, blech, awful pun)

i'm not huge on new year's resolutions, really. they're a nice gutcheck, and they're alright in principle, but i prefer not to restrict my self-improvement resolutions to one day a year. they just sort of pop up whenever, and i like it better that way. but, keeping with common tradition, i guess my one big resolution is: have more of a social life. that is, see my friends more. get out and do more stuff. i'm still funemployed, which means i have no excuse for being too wiped to go out in the evenings (plus: no early mornings!), and plus i know i was a huge homebody in 2009. i was okay with that for the most part, but i'm positive that i need to push myself back out of my comfort zone and get out there and see more people daily. social muscle needs to be exercised and all that.

oh yeah, and i guess getting a job should be a new year's resolution too, but i'm fairly confident that'll all work out. right now, it looks like my #1 prospective job might not happen until february, and even then it might only be on a part-time at-home basis for a few months, so i'm focusing on trying to grab a part-time job for january and possibly beyond, given on how this other thing works out. or maybe i'll gun for a full-on new job altogether. i dunno. more details as i see fit to release 'em. in the meantime, send me job offers plz.

(one more resolution-type dealy: eat less carbs. not eliminate them atkins-style, but just go easier on 'em. what can i say, i'm a carb child -- brought up to love bread, pasta, crackers and starch)



me trying to take a picture of the pretty pretty snowfall outside our back door. instead it looks like a nuclear apocalypse is raining down from above. damn you, tricky camera settings!


oh shit, now magazine, massive fail! not sure if non-torontonians will care, but the forehead-slapping fail is definitely worth checking out. nice to see that giambrone took it in stride, though. (just ignore the comments thread at blog to, though -- it gets pretty bigoted due to some ignorant trolls)

admire this guy: he's watching 30 chick flicks in 30 days, in an attempt to better understand the female psyche. i, for one, give the man props, as i've only ever forced my boyfriend through one chick flick - julie & julia - and he looked tortured for the first twenty minutes before falling half-asleep through the rest.

more on movies with roger ebert's best films of the decade. love me some ebert, particularly because of how insanely well-written he is as a critic. when he's effusing about a film he loves, it's like an emotional punch to the stomach. i love it when a critic's passion for their subject comes through like that. seriously, the last line, on being a critic: "That doesn't make one person right and another wrong. All it means is that you know how they really felt, not how they thought they should feel." bang. right there. i get that.

bookreadins: i just bombed through the entirety of guillermo del toro & chuck hogan's the strain in 2.5 days (also, the library wanted it back within seven days or else they send michelle out to take you down, matrix-style). it's not quite as layered or nuanced as a stephen king novel - reminder to self to find a copy of under the dome asap - but it really is, as one of the dustcover quotations says, "i am legend by way of salem's lot". if you've read and/or seen both, you'll get it.

and there is your news, culture and general bullshit for new year's day 2010. nhl 2010 winter classic on at 1 p.m. today, so you know where to find me.

[ music | none ]