Saturday, March 29, 2008


recording this for posterity, because i think it deserves to be remembered:

one of the usual customers came around to the cafe today, maybe a little after four o'clock, or whenever both my baristas had gone home and it was just me working the floor. this guy is one of the older gentlemen who works in the building, and although he's been snippy with me on a few occasions in the past, he's generally a nice guy. just doesn't always have much patience for young whippersnapper goth girls who run coffee shops. but hey, who always does?

anyway, he was in a good mood today, and ordered a cookie along with his coffee -- only one, though, since he joked that he was watching his waistline. i joked back that it was almost swimsuit season, and this led him to mention his wife and how she could never indulge in cookies because she worries too much about her weight.

"she'll gain five pounds, and that's a big deal for her," he said to me. i shrugged and replied that the media's rough on all women and can really mess with our body image ideals, and he conceded that this was true.

"but what my wife doesn't understand," he said, "is that for me, the women of the world are divided two ways: her, and not her."

...even now, the romanticism of that offhand statement blows me away.

so i smiled, grateful for all the women in the world who have partners like him, and told him that i hope i have a husband some day who feels that way. and i meant that more than anything.

there need to be more men out there like that guy, i think.

[ music | the cure, "the same deep water as you" ]

Thursday, March 27, 2008

on deaf ears

the new most godly thing ever: heinz tomato soup. that link is british because for some reason, the stuff from the uk kicks the snot out of the tinned goodness here from the homeland (even the campbell's i used to live off of...well, maybe past tense is wrong, there). it's probably because it actually has cream as one of the ingredients; thus, it's not negative ten calories, but it's plus ten tasty. mmmmm, soup.

okay, enough rhapsodizing over foodstuffs. (yes, matthew, this is your fault)

dr. pepper + chinese democracy = weirdest publicity stunt ever? i don't know, i kind of enjoy watching fast-food chains and junk food giants embarrass themselves by coming up with desperate marketing ploys like this one. i'm betting they teach a course about how to come up with tactics like this in business college. (pitchfork has the best take on it. "plastic he-beast", hee hee)

much, much cooler news: preliminary lineup for toronto's virgin fest! is it sad that i want to see oasis more than i want to see foo fighters, and thus will only get a ticket for the second day? (i'm always too poor to afford the whole damn weekend) and, like, paul weller. come on now.

sled island fest. hipsterville? (seriously, if my loving of "terrible" postgrunge and metal bands means that i don't have to listen to the meandering precious twee-pop that's considered universally music-critic approved, then i think i'm okay with that. really.)

mexico declares war on emo. if this were a few days later, i'd call april fool's joke, but as it is...uh? (and while we're at it, don't forget -- god hates goths.)

somewhere, charlie bucket weeps. that sucks.

now! the boy is getting into town on friday (possibly saturday, weather and drive conditions from edmonton permitting) and will be in british columbia until next wednesday. have since assembled a "care package" that, given my overbearing caregiver nature particularly when it comes to touring musicians, soon grew to ridiculous proportions; aside from the road-trip standards of crackers, cookies, granola bars and trail mix, it also includes dried mango slices, specialized "joint health" packets of emergen-c, a bag of werther's, lip balm, super fucking cool oral fixation mints (mojito mint!), and wasabi cashews. i've always spoiled my rock star boys rotten -- finally having one all to myself means i get to go overboard. eheh.

i've been reading blog to again. it makes me homesick beyond belief. i am also a masochist.

p.s. to whomever from the toronto star is sporadically reading this: could you get me a job? or at least let me know how to win you guys over with my witty writing and absurdly clean copy? thanks.

[ music | siouxsie & the banshees, "cities in dust" ]

Saturday, March 22, 2008

i want it i need it

four day weekend! four day weekend!

...the first day of which i had the misfortune of being bedridden, sipping ginger ale and watching queer as folk dvds (reminder: brian kinney = absolute greatness and probably one of my top fictional characters ever) and trying (and not trying, when the chest pain got to be too much) to hack up a lung in hopes of getting some relief from bronchial agony. my early spring colds tend to be the worst of the lot, and i guess i was asking for one given that i spent last weekend not getting much sleep, drinking/smoking too much, and getting on a couple of airplanes ("germ tubes" as my friend refers to them). double the frustration since i absolutely hate having to lie around all day doing nothing -- not to mention it was an absolutely gorgeous sunny spring day in vancouver, and you all know how rare those can be. hurrah.

but! the bedrest seemed to have some effect, since i am no longer coughing up foreign objects, and i was even able to go to the gym this morning without scaring half the patrons into thinking i had bird flu. so at least now i can get around to doing all the chores and errands that i need this entire long weekend to accomplish. (seriously, my things weren't even unpacked until yesterday. all hail life in the fast lane.)

one good way to spend a british columbian weekend (albeit in, well, july): pemberton fest. holy fuck look at that lineup. i will undoubtedly be dirt poor in ontario at that moment, so i'm out, but i would probably kill to be there. and i don't even know where pemberton is.

musicians trying to find new ways to connect with audiences. this is sort of fascinating, since you can really - and, well, always could - see a split between the musicians who'd rather have nothing to do with their fans, and the ones who understand that they'd be nothing without the kids that love them. i have no fucking respect for the former and nothing but respect for the latter.

the phenomenon that is tokio hotel is no longer delegated to europe. god help us all. (given that one of my cafe's past baristas was german and one-half of my current barista team is german as well, there are plenty of tokio hotel jokes bandied around on the floor, as well as many references to david hasselhoff)

i'm quite happy that gasoline is starting to be updated more frequently, including with this interview with "nicest guy in rock" dave grohl. though, errr, copy editor? there's a difference between "minor" and "miner". just so you know.

the html tagline for this one is perfect: "fall out boy suicide drama". in the world of emo, aren't suicide attempts considered street cred? (and let's not even go into the number of people who wish pete had succeeded... i dunno, i still kind of like the guy. guilty pleasure.)

more good shots and a brief wrapup from the liquor-soaked c'mon gig in toronto last friday. i can't even remember how many drinks i had by the end of that night, but i do think i remember this guy as being the photog who asked to snap my photo as i cheered on my baby from sidestage. wish i could find that shot, it was actually half-decent (cleavage - or lack thereof - and all).

also, exciting: come the end of may, i might be going out on the road to do merch for left spine down. they're sweet guys and it'd be an adventure for's hoping i can land a job in toronto that'll give me the week off. i ask for so much.

man oh man, i need a fucking haircut. but first, to go outside and enjoy the blooming cherry blossoms.

p.s. bonus super-cute photo taken last night at a coworker's farewell party, of yours truly and her two beloved baristas (aka the captain and crew of the failboat):

yes, we run a coffee shop. beware. (and every time i wear red lipstick, i'm somewhat terrified of how much i resemble my mother)

[ music | econoline crush, "home" ]

Thursday, March 20, 2008

so tonight that i might see

okay, indulge me -- here's how i spent my spring-break weekend in my old hometown of toronto:

back to the merch-girl routine! not a rough job at all given the quality of the merch...(vinyl! t-shirts! gorgeous posters!)

...merch girl's titties not included. sorry, guys.

reunions with old friends, however, were included. here's me and ryan, my former work buddy with whom i survived a number of near disasters, chaos and explosions. we've got each others' backs for life, yo.

slightly more awkward-type posing with the a-friends, amanda and allegra. they look rad and awesome, while i kind of look like a cartoon character. with big teeth and fat neck. oh well.

this is the man whose apartment and/or bedroom i spent approximately 89% of my ontario time in. he makes me want to jump on him and scream delightedly and set things on fire and run through the streets at night. he has a grin that makes me absolutely die inside, and he makes me feel like awesome, pretty much. he probably reads this blog and just isn't telling me (i'm onto you, baby), but that's okay cuz he's a fox. he is a bona fide rock star and he is also my boyfriend.

he also plays drums while employing a nifty blur effect.

with the frontman of the band, the legendary sir ian, playing the basement of a house party in hamilton last saturday night. no, seriously. they even had samosas.

bassist katie lynn is a rock goddess, for reals, and a southern sweetheart. mad props.

there is a better copy of this around on someone else's camera, but i really just adore this shot. yes, we're posing, but it looks so goddamn spontaneous -- like, cheesy romantic-drama spontaneous. we rule so hard.

...see? again, posing, but not. we're like a rock n' roll dirtbag version of a cologne ad.

we had four days to make up for three months of no pda due to, well, living on opposite ends of the country. i think we filled the quota.

another wishlist need filled: we got the sashimi boat at sushi island. total fucking raw fish awesomeness. don't knock it till you've tried it., those are the more interesting shots from my days spent in my heartland. people ask me why i went home for some seemingly random weekend in march (especially since this coming weekend is the actual holiday long weekend). i open my mouth and come out with a number of answers - because i had concerts to go to, because i had a city to visit, because i had friends i missed, because i had a boy to see - but really, i had to remember all the things i missed, and i had to remind myself of everything i will be going back to in a month and a half.

yes, i'm moving back to toronto in may.

it'd be too quick to assume that i'm making that decision because of the boy; true, he's a big part of it, but i was planning on moving back east in august anyway, and for more reasons that just the fact that i've finally gotten into a solid, promising relationship. the real meaning behind all of it just kind of came out when i was talking to some old friends at the `shoe on friday night and, as so often happens, the spontaneous off-the-cuff answer was the absolute truth.

see, here in vancouver, i've got the comforts that many people are looking for: a solid steady job (monday to friday, 9 to 5, weekends off) that pays pretty well, an affordable and great apartment, beautiful surroundings and a cheaper living situation than i ever had in five years of living in toronto. for once, i'm not struggling between three jobs to pay my bills and rent. i can even sort of relax and have a social life again here in vancouver.

in toronto right now, there is none of that. i have no home there and no job, thus no money and nowhere to live. but what i do have there are the things that really, truly make me happy: the scene, the music, the life of the city, my friends, and the guy who won my heart and renewed my faith in real, honest affection. that's what i need to live and breathe: not the security of money or four walls. i want what i love. it's the simple, most base instinct.

so, a month and a half, and we'll see where things go from there.

[ music | bush, "everything zen" ]

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

for the afterglow

...whahey, the world went on without me!

seriously, i can't say i'm overly interested in catching up on all the sxsw recaps that i missed when i was locked up in a toronto apartment all last weekend (and just got home around midnight on monday, thus proving that, since i've been on a dozen flights by now and i haven't yet died in a hideous fiery crash, there really might be something to this "airplane" concept), because for one, there's just too damn much of it (frank is right, just hit up technorati), and for two, i feel like i had a far superior weekend. will do a quick recap with photos for those two or three of ya who are bizarrely fascinated by my personal life very soon. (brief related preview, of sorts. that's the gig i was selling merch at last friday night, and that is my boyfriend's band. they rock harder than you. fact.)

in the meantime...

the most serious and heartbreaking shit that's gone down in the past couple days: my darlings and tour brothers, the black halos (refresher: i went on the road with them a year ago), had all their gear - and their van, and their trailer, and their merch - stolen in montreal a few nights ago. right from outside their hotel. i mean, fuck. a full list is at their myspace page. repost that link everywhere you can, s.v.p.? this is the shittiest thing that could happen to those poor boys, and they've been through a hell of a lot in the span of their career.

slightly happier: more cure tribute albums! i gotta admit, i can be as much of a sucker for a tribute album as i can be for a good cover song, and these ones look pretty hopeful. but otherwise, hey, you probably have the real thing coming your way on tour sometime soon...

speaking of touring, one name: leonard cohen. fuckin' right!

the 50 most controversial album covers of all time. not for those with weak stomachs, though a good 90% of those covers are like traffic accidents: can't...look...away...

i am vegetarian and proud. never liked pig meat anyway.

as a testament to my old nerdiness: kevin conroy returns to voice batman in the new animated dvd movie! holy fuck holy fuck yessss. the guy who commented about how he wishes they could dub conroy over christian bale in the suit is my new hero.

still in the realm of geeky movies, ontd! recaps what we know of the new street fighter movie cast. vega is actually a pretty good choice, though it's gonna take some serious effort to wipe away the horrid memories of the original sf movie for me. all hail street fighter II: the animated movie. (first real "adult" anime i ever saw, for serious)

and, of course, because the film world called for it: zombie strippers. you're welcome.

[ music | die mannequin, "do it or die" ]

Thursday, March 13, 2008

coming back to you

i'm leaving for toronto tomorrow night. i'm going to see a boy.

and unlike last time, there is no nervousness or anxiety. unlike last time, there is no uncertainty in my mind about this whatsoever.

unlike last time, i probably could explain it, but until the words are said out loud, until i know for sure, i would much rather smile secretively and keep it to myself.


i'll be back next week.

[ music | the sisters of mercy, "we are the same, susanne" ]

Saturday, March 8, 2008

all said and done

alright. so! first week totally in charge of the failboat: survived, with minimal damage. sure, there were unexplained computer errors and wacky customers and my boss breathing down my neck, but all in all it was a successful week -- at least, as far as tips were concerned. yeah, the three of us make nothing compared to waitresses and bartenders, but for baristas, we rake it in harder than any of the chain's other stores.

i mean, okay, it's still stressful. even when things are going swimmingly, i still stress out in positions of responsibility -- because i'm always worried about the inevitable, the evitable, the things that are coming up and the things i can't control. for example, the computer system issues on thursday: i left work that day feeling defeated and worried about what friday would bring, even though i'd done all i could possibly do. my father put it in perspective for me when he said, "are they expecting you to walk on water?" no. but i have a hard time not expecting that of myself, especially when the onus is on me to be in charge of things.

so yeah: stress, even though the extra pay is almost sort of worth it. to celebrate the end of the first week, i'm off to seattle in a couple of hours with buddy melissa to see one of her favourite indie bands play tonight, and also to get in some shopping, sightseeing and whatnot. i'm just more looking forward to getting the hell out of this city for a couple days -- and, okay, buying cheapass parliament lights as well. and totally getting hammered tonight before we crash at the bassist's house in tacoma. rock n' roll, motherfuckers.

backlogged pop culture news that i'm sure everybody's heard already:

canadian music week is in full swing in toronto right now and, if the exhausted-sounding status updates from my facebook friends list are any indication, it's going off perfectly. i remember that happy fatigue very well, oh yes i do. my homies at chartattack have your festival coverage (including this short piece i did on the saint alvia cartel).

and you know, seriously, i love hawksley workman. i love his romanticism, i love his music, i love the fact that he used to live in my neighbourhood in toronto, and i just all-around love the dude himself. i will probably have no time or money to see him when he makes it out here to the west coast, but the sentiment is still there.

something probably only my scenester friends will find amusing: crystal castles' grand reveal!...of course, most of us knew all that already. but the fact that it's newsworthy to some definitely brings the lolz.

keith richards boning up on his biblical knowledge...? nah, that's just in the leading paragraph -- no worries, it still bores him to death, apparently. all hail the atheists and agnostics! (and although can't say i even like the stones - seriously, when i did "gimme shelter" in rock band at garry's last house party, i sang it a la the sepulchral sisters of mercy cover version - those quotes from keef are golden)

holy fuck, radiohead and nine inch nails to headline lollapalooza 2008?? now that would be a sight to damn well see. fortunately, the guy and i are planning a weekend in chitown sometime this summer, so this may just be the perfect excuse...

and on the old homefront: winter storm wreaks havoc at pearson airport. while i feel for all my posses back home, this is more of a concern to me because, well...circumstances that are occurring next week. that's all i'll say for now. keep your fingers crossed for me and all other torontonians, though: no more snow!

for now, though, i'm off to washington state. photos to come. love you all.

[ music | morrissey, "irish blood, english heart" ]

Saturday, March 1, 2008

smoke on the water

i feel kind of bad commenting on this - especially when toronto's still getting extreme cold weather warnings - but seriously, no one ever told me that february in vancouver is like late april in toronto. honest to fucking god, it's like patio weather out there. (okay, so maybe a few days this week were filled with "vancouver sunshine" - ugly drizzly rain - but it's supposed to be gorgeous again today, which = happy)

oho, what is this? new stellastarr* album info, you say? a definite way to perk up my morning...although i don't know exactly how a band like stella could make an album that's even more up-tempo than the past (well, okay, harmonies for the haunted was a little slow...but come on, "sweet troubled soul"? fucking greatness)

the bigger news on, though, is the results of the shockwaves nme awards. actually kind of funny how this ties into my opening paragraph -- i remember the shockwaves last year, because i was interviewing razorlight the day of the awards ceremony, and i ended up wading knee-deep through snow and icy hail in order to get to their hotel. i was that damn determined to get my interview. but it also reminds me just how shitty toronto weather is at this time of year, as compared to, well, here. score one for vancouvs.

here's something interesting that you've probably heard about already: maxim writer reviews the new black crowes album without actually hearing it. speaking as someone on the inside...this isn't really a rare event, sad to say. i've known of a few cases, just never an album that high-profile. (...but what's this? maxim's backtracking? well, i wouldn't expect so much from them - they're a "men's magazine", not a music rag after all - but it's still an interesting news thread to follow. here comes the blame game!)

sasquatch music festival has a damn good lineup, oh yes it does. and considering the fact that i'm now not too far from washington state...well, the chance to see my beloved cure twice in one week - they're playing vancouver the next day - is most likely gonna prove irresistable. yes please.

owen pallett loses health coverage. i can sympathize and relate. and cross my fingers i don't break any bones between now and the time i move back to ontario.

some eye candy for ya: iron man movie trailers! i was never into the comic per se - i was a spider-man girl first, x-men girl second - but i squeal with delight over the placement of sabbath's ephemeral song every time i watch those trailers. hurrah!

....aaaaaaand saturday is a go. love you guys. happy march!

p.s. managing the store is touch and go, but it's going, and nothing's exploded yet (save for one of the faucets yesterday, after i used it to douse out a smoldering trash-can fire, so i assume that's a good sign. though i kind of like seeing the looks of amused confusion on the faces of the delivery guys when i refer to myself as being "the new captain of the failboat" (inside joke, apologies).

[ music | the conscience pilate, "never for you" ]